March 20, 2016: Memorial Service Mixed Emotions

I’m starting a new chapter of what has become predominantly a travel blog. As there is quite a bit of travel coming up, this is a great way to keep in touch with my family and other friends.

Memorial services are full of mixed emotions for me. On Sunday, March 20, I attended my uncle’s memorial service in the San Jose area. My in-laws graciously hosted me and my father, who flew in from Minnesota, to remember his brother.

Uncle Rand driving the tractor while my dad, the older brother, pitches the hay.
Uncle Rand driving the tractor while my dad, the older brother, pitches the hay.

It was important for me to be there to support my Aunt Connie.

Connie stands behind her sister Ann.
Connie stands behind her sister Ann.

Connie relentlessly advocated and cared for Rand after a massive stroke 10 years ago–as only a retired elementary school principal and loving spouse can. I developed such an admiration of Connie through her care-giving journey. She is an amazing woman!

In the midst of the sorrow, there was the joy of being with family. I had a great connection with my cousin, Kiki. I have seen her only twice since I was 16, but this was an enriching connection. I came away so grateful for my time together, and for the graciousness of my in-laws.

From left to right: me, Dad, his sister Karen, and her daughter, Kiki.
From left to right: me, Dad, his sister Karen, and her daughter, Kiki.

I did take a bit of time to also see friends from Tanzania, Jim and Judy Bangsund. Judy has a special place in my heart for her depth of welcome the first time I met her, but also for her care of me after the first miscarriage in Tanzania. She drove four hours round trip to be with me and bring homemade Irish soda bread.

My extended family wasn’t very close, as we were scattered over the USA, and a chunk of my childhood spent farther away in Hong Kong. That was one of the things I appreciated about marrying into Eric’s family, as they regularly gathered. Now as nieces are getting older and a work relocation, it is a little more fractured. However, this weekend renewed an awareness of the cosmic connection of family, even if the gatherings aren’t very frequent. This is part of the reason why I’ve tried to rally my siblings to meet each summer in Minnesota. Fortunately, an end of June trip is planned to nurture the family connections.

With blessings,

Beth

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